You and I can never be friends.
You want to know why we can’t be friends? It’s as simple as “you will never be happy for me” I don’t hate you, the universe knows I want to but I won’t hate you because as one of my dear friends pointed out to me; sometimes some people just can’t be happy for others.
You know I used to blame myself for the failure of our once close bond. I actually used to think it was something I had done or perhaps just being me was what tore us apart. Now a grown women I can see you just don’t want to be happy for me. Yes that’s right it’s not you can’t, it’s you won’t and don’t because another simple fact; what doesn’t benefit you, what is not about you, you have no time or patience for.
I convinced myself that because I have always been vain I must in fact be extremely self centred but as you have constantly pointed out over the years I do nothing but put others before myself and before you.
The more I think about past situations, past disagreements, past comments it suddenly dawned on me how self centred you actually are!
If you are not self centred why do you always appear to listen to what I have to say, write, show you and then turn it around and reply with how whatever I’m talking about is somehow about you?
I could be telling you it’s a beautiful day today. Your telling me how you made it beautiful, because of course you either God or Mother Nature? Perhaps both because everything is you or you related right?
The strange thing is and maybe it’s also stupid on my part there has been plenty of times I have openly been proud of you.
I didn’t realise to you, that we are in fact in your head in constant competition.
The way I saw things was I have my talents and you have yours, you see it as you have to be better than me all the time. I like attention I admit that, you however crave the attention. There’s nothing wrong with that either but does that mean you can’t ever share the limelight? Does that mean hurting people? Tearing them down just so you can shine?
You used to mean so many things to me but as we have grown and branched out I’ve become ashamed of the person you now are. I thought that everyone grew up and changed at some point. Not you. You grew but unfortunately you haven’t changed. You have become more bitter, judgemental, competitive, insecure. The worst part it doesn’t even end there.
Who are you? Do you even know? Your trying so hard to tear me down, act the victim and heroine all in one go so much that you’ve become lost and you don’t even see it. You had dreams but instead of following them you chose to follow me. Decided building a hate campaign against me would somehow get you noticed, make people see both of us for who we really are, make you feel better about yourself.
Has it made you feel better about yourself? Because surprise, surprise I’ve always shown my true colours and my true face, people have only started to see you for who and what you really are and guess what they are now judging you. Kind of ironic isn’t it? Let the judges be judged!
Hope you read this and turn your life around.
Hope this inspires and motivates you to do something other than wasting your life, trying to waste mine.
The thing is I would have loved to share all my glory and success with you right by my side where you actually belong but instead you chose this path of darkness and I got off that road a very long time ago so if you don’t choose to stray from the path your on you will end up alone.