How do you see me?


Isn’t it funny how we see ourselves and how other people see us?

After publishing my first book I have quite a lot of feedback mostly good; some surprising!

People were surprised about the contents (not just because of all the sexual content) but also because of what my character revealed about the other side of me people rarely get to see.

I’m an open person and the more I write articles for this blog the more people learn about me and I learn about myself.

However the book goes deeper into a person I used to be and people are shocked.

I’ve had comments like ‘you portray this tough girl attitude, but your actually a lot softer’, ‘your a bit of a bad girl I thought you were a goody two shoes’, and ‘when I first met you I thought you were a geek/boffin, you are soooo different’.

I giggle at these presumptions I never knew I came across like any of any of those things. I always thought I was the kinda person that was “what you see is what you get” apparently not.

So many people tell me I inspire them, because of my strength, my openness and for how relatable I am especially after reading my book and some from reading my blog.

I never thought as myself as any of these things and I’m glad that people now can see me for who I am and understand me a lot better.

It’s funny my muse from last year who funny enough is still strongly inspiring me and these posts said to me she tries so hard not to judge people, but when she met me she judged me to be someone who she would not get along with but for 10 years now we have been best friends..omg Lucie have we really been friends that long now? Wow! Lol.

Just like her I hate to judge and try so hard not to but when I met her my first impressions of her were very different to who she actually is.

I’m not sure why or how we come to such quick conclusions of each other. I know some people hide behind a facade, some people are two faced but what about the others like me or my friend? Why do we look one way to people but are totally the other way?

I know growing up I was very insecure about a lot of things so in order to protect myself and heart I showed the world a different face even those closest to me.
Now I’m all grown up and have changed I don’t hide so much in areas where I am secure.

Sometimes I still get in a situation where I feel uncomfortable so I have to put my “brave” face on and act like this extremely loud mouthed, confident person because I feel like I know it’s what people expect from me because of their preconceptions.

However even that has become too much of an effort especially as I get older and I feel if you don’t get me, you don’t want to. If you pre judge me it’s because you can’t be bothered to get to know me and quite frankly I don’t care anymore.

What about you guys? To judge or not to judge?

Is there people you have pre judged only to find they were completely different to who or what you thought?

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