Book Snippet; Diary Entry Jan 2012

Jan 2012

Although I was still having fun seeing Geraldine, I was beginning to feel a little stifled. In between seeing her she would message or call me everyday. There where moments where she didn’t even have anything to say and I would watch TV while she stayed silent on the other end of the line. I understood she loved speaking to me, being around me and hearing my voice but it got to the point where I just felt suffocated.

It was also understandable as by this point she had broken up with her daughters father so I guess she needed someone to cling too. It was strange for me because I had always seen her as the type to be strong and independent. The kind of woman who boasted about not “needing a man” turns out she needed him more than we both thought.

I grew a little distant and more closer to my friend Natasha who stated maybe I felt differently towards Geraldine now that I had stepped over the line and slept with her. I didn’t want to believe her. She said maybe Geraldine felt stronger about me than I realised, but again I shook it off as ridiculous.
I thought maybe it was all in my head and that I should just be happy Geraldine felt close enough to me to rely on me for support.

Late January My friend Jerry had a “new years” party. My sisters and I attended, so did Shaun, Aaron and their cousin Sebastian. We had a blast. We all got so drunk, partied hard, screaming at the top of our lungs. Me and Aaron shared an intimate dance. I could feel his manhood rock hard digging into my bum as I grinded on him. In that moment I wanted him so much as always. I slyly put my hand behind my back and felt how hard he was with my hands, he kissed me on my neck I laughed and we carried on grinding hard with no care in the world. While we danced together Shaun and Charmaine also grinded the sexual tension in that living room at that party that night was off the scales.

Their cousin felt a little left out so I pulled him up and all 5 of us danced together.
I loved the close bond me, Shaun, Charmaine and Aaron shared. The fact that we could all have an orgy at one point, flirt outrageously, and still be good friends meant a great deal to me. That was such a good night.
Shaun went home with Aaron that night and I returned to my mum’s house with my sister Charmaine. Even if we wanted to have some fun we were all way to drunk.

I called Shaun the next day and he immediately said he knew exactly what I was thinking when he saw me dancing with Aaron. We both giggled. I love we can talk and laugh about these things.

My birthday was coming up in the following weeks and although things felt a little strange with Geraldine, I still invited her out to celebrate with me and my other friends.

Disclaimer: These events, locales and conversations are directly from my journal/ memories of them. In order to maintain their anonymity in some instances I have changed the names of individuals, I may have changed some identifying characteristics and details such as physical properties.


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