I started this new challenge 1st December 2013.
For the full challenge details please look at previous post which has been re-blogged from the wonderful site http://theenduringmind.com/2013/11/22/enduring-life-21-day-bad-habit-challenge/.
The bad habits I wanted to focus on getting rid of that I felt were really important to me were:
The year 2013 was filled with drama for me and not the kind I wanted or needed in my life. I had been caught up in so much drama it was changing me. Everyone knew me for my drama. My friends who I would meet up with or who would visit me would always ask without fail ‘so Carley what’s the new drama in your life at the moment’. It was shameful.
At the time I didn’t know it. In fact most of the time I enjoyed it. I thought drama is a part of life and everyone is going through it right? WRONG. The type of drama I was constantly involved with was not the same as everybody else’s, it was individual to me.
I reached breaking point when I realized that drama was stressing me to the point it was making me physically and mentally ill.
Coming across Pachet’s article and taking part in the challenge made me realise I had to change and this was the perfect time to do it.
I procrastinate all the time with little things, we all do. “I’ll do the laundry tomorrow”, “I will call you later”, “I will do the chores in an hour” sound familiar? These are just little things and not too important but sometimes “later” never comes and all of a sudden you have a big list of things to do.
These things didn’t always bother me until I started to procrastinate with bigger even more important things.
I am currently writing a novel. I love to write and becoming a published author has always been my dream since I was a little girl. I started creating a novel in the beginning of 2013 but very quickly the harder it became, the more time it consumed and the more work it took I quickly began to procrastinate. I wanted to finish the book but I kept procrastinating and not a lot of it was getting done.
I was also in the beginnings of starting a new business but somewhere down the line I began to lose focus and again started procrastinating.
I started the challenge after realising the two major things above had began to spiral out of control.
Day 1-7 I wrote down in my notebook as suggested ‘I AM AWARE THAT MY BAD HABITS ARE PROCRASTINATION AND BEING INVOLVED IN DRAMA’ I have to admit two things about doing this the first few days:
1. I felt like I was in some sort of addiction meeting like AA (alcoholics Anonymous) no offence intended to anyone who attends such meetings. It was weird writing this everyday and I was doubtful at first if it was going to work but carried on anyway.
2. I felt silly like a school girl in detention writing the same lines over and over again but on a daily basis rather than a missed playtime /reception.
Drama started and I quickly remembered the challenge, I remained calm and collected and put my head down. Although it was an important family matter, involving myself was not necessary as it would only heighten the situation and cause me stress later down the line.
I wrote this in my notebook as a ‘almost slip up’ and as I reflected I felt so good about myself that the challenge was working.
This was a defining moment for me this was the day I had a light-bulb moment I wrote
“I firstly became involved in drama by caring. I ask or seek what is wrong and not only try to help but take the situation on as my own. I realise sometimes trying to fix things can escalate problems into DRAMA even when it is not my intention. Sometimes although I mean well I need to take a BACK SEAT to others problems. Taking on others problems weigh so heavy on me it makes my emotional balance become negatively imbalanced. There’s nothing wrong with showing I care but I must make an effort to stay out of certain situations that do not concern me. PROCRASTINATION! I think I do this because I know a task will be hard or long – something negative. I am more likely to do something straight away if I look at the task more positively. Or if I do a task without thinking so much about what it will be like, I can do it without procrastinating.”
Day 10-17 ‘The bait and Switch’
Drama started but after my revelation above and continuously writing my acknowledgements everyday again I did not involve myself in such drama’s. I listened intently to friends and families drama’s and offered advice were asked but kept opinions to myself where they were not needed or welcomed.
I also started to look at people and situations differently at this point. I realised how much drama these people had on their own without me having to intervene or interact, and I also realised even more so that I never wanted to be caught up in these drama’s for the rest of my life.
I started doing more daily ‘to do’ lists another handy tip from Pachet (thank you very much) and started to organise and plan new chapters, brainstorms and ideas for my upcoming novel. I found just like my revelation once I was in the “zone” of typing or creating material for my book I actually got lost in the time I sat there doing it and enjoyed every moment they do say ‘time flies when you’re having fun’.
I was feeling fantastic! Drama was to a minimum, and wherever it arose I swiftly would show it the door. I was no longer procrastinating but organised and ready for 2014. This new blog is ‘Exhibit A’ I wanted to create a new blog away from the old blog of pain and articles of drama but the thought of taking time to create a new blog was initially slowing me down, however it is now up for you all to see.
In conclusion it has come to the point when drama arises it actually makes me feel uncomfortable rather than empowered and I now know there is no more place for silly things like it in my life. Of course with a new baby on the way and the business adventure I am embarking on; drama’s of a certain level will arise but I am prepared and embrace that kind, and I am confident when it happens I will be able to deal with it, with a less ‘drama queen’ attitude.
I want to succeed in both my business adventures this year, so badly that I can taste it, so procrastination is another thing that is no longer welcome in my life when it comes to things of a business nature.
Thank you Pachet, your challenge saved me and changed my life and for this I love you xx
Lady Blaze ~ PEACE.LOVE.POSITIVITY
- Types of Procrastination and How You Can Fix Them (lifehack.org)
- Procrastination Is A Killer! Here’s How To Fight It Off (madamenoire.com)
- You Will Stop Procrastinating After Reading This (lifehack.org)